It’s not you. It’s me….

I can’t tell you how I hate that phrase.  In real life, it’s an overused phrase that comes with its own meme. The phrase signifies the end of a relationship and, in an effort to not crush your feelings, the individual goes on to explain that there is just something about themselves that prevents them from having a relationship with you.  That somehow they are to blame for the failed relationship. Unfortunately, what they’re actually telling you more often than not is:  “It’s you.  Totally.  No doubt about it.  I’m just being  nice  an ass.”

And you know what, it really IS all about you….

If you think about it, sports can be a lot like relationships.  In sports, just as in relationships, you can spend all your time thinking, or worrying, about what someone else is up to.  In Gymkhana, that “someone” is your competition.  Focusing on what the competition is doing is a distraction that keeps you from focusing on what YOU should be doing.

“The more you concentrate on beating another athlete, the less chance that you will. 

Dr. Alan Goldberg

When competing, the focus should be on you and your horse.  Far too often riders get caught up in someone else’s time.  Perhaps they even focus on their competitor knocking a pole or a barrel.  In reality, it is you that you need to concentrate on.  According to Dr. Goldberg, “…When athletes stop focusing on themselves and instead begin to think too much about the competition, then choking and performance problems are the end result.”

Think about that on your first ride of the season.  Don’t worry about how your competition rode last year. Don’t obsess whether they bought a shiny new horse, or thousands of dollars in tack.  Just worry about your horse and you.  In reality, that’s all that matters.

Remember:  It’s not you.  It’s me

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